The Black Box.

I call the therapist Kit - as in Kit Marlowe - Kit is not the therapist's actual name. The dialogues are from recordings. I find myself once more thinking that I should make an official complaint. All I know is, I cannot let this go, because something went very wrong in our 'therapy sessions'. The Black Box exists because only understanding why the plane crashed, prevents similar accidents. This therapist - sorry, psychotherapist was proud of his qualifications. Qualifications, clearly, are no guarantee of safe therapy. 23rd May 2022.  Minimising the emotional impact of what happened to my family. Undermining my interpretation of events. Minimising the distress I'm in. Laughing.  Missing a potential safeguarding issue. Rings Around The Moon. Me:  ...he (husband) reminded me of the character of the android, the synth ( Ash ). The android has been programmed with the imperative to sacrifice the crew to get an alien onto the ship, the Nostromo , somehow. We were the cr...

There is in many of us, obviously, a deep-seated desire to assent to extraterrestrial forces – to be embraced by them, overwhelmed by them, and if possible deprived by them of our own weary responsibility for ourselves. ​— ​“HICCUPS FROM OUTER SPACE”: RUSSELL DAVIES, REVIEWING CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND, IN THE OBSERVER, MARCH 19, 1978 Vallee, Jacques. Messengers of Deception: UFO Contacts and Cults (p. 32).  Eros is deeply, deeply irrational, and traditionally understood as a yearning for the sublime. A chalice of wonder and bliss we can't ignore.  And we seek the the outer to ignite the inner... The quote made me think. About the sublime. About Eros. About yearning. And I'd not considered how powerful people's yearnings for "The space brothers" can be until I read Messengers . A yearning for the benevolent, wisdom rich, anomalous saviours of the Earth, that some people hope will save us from the horror engines of war, of mechanised murder. I hadn't c...

Nigredo, or blackness, is the first stage of the alchemical magnum opus, representing putrefaction, decomposition, and the "dark night of the soul". I am not sitting on rocks looking out at the infinitely blue-black deep of Muxia. Instead, I watch waves of blackness roll through me. YouTube lets me know when he has posted. I don't follow him, but YouTube knows that I care and so...so even if I didn't want to know, I know and it is my habit to  'turn my ear to The Great Below'. It hurts. There is no remedy. No truth. No flux, no dissolution, no nigredo.  The subject of his video? Blackness. Dressed in black, black background. His lecture tears my heart wide open. We are so far apart that we meet. Enantiodromia - Jung, following Heraclitus, so named this phenomenon. In the philosophy of Heraclitus it [enantiodromia] is used to designate the play of opposites in the course of events—the view that everything that exists turns into its opposite. C.G. Jung (1949)...

Back in the library at dinner time. VNV Nation on my headphones. Short cut.  Condense everything to a very short, easy to understand paragraph. Go! I believe that the therapist understood 'therapy' as  a process of separation; child strategies from adult knowledge. Child reality, written in the mind in response to less than perfect parents. In the therapist's understanding these feelings and beliefs are the problem. They created the filter through which the world appears - distorted . Remedy, again I stress that this is simply a model, comes through a dialogue that leads to understanding the filter. New understanding is the basis for separating the self from old beliefs to ways to see and feel.  Method? The nurturing parent in the therapist meets the Child in the client, and the Child feels understood and secure in that relationship. The security enables to therapist and client to speak Adult to Adult. And? And I don't agree. I don't disagree either, but for goodne...